Definitions

Recently it was suggested I look up the word "irony". So here it is....

i·ro·ny [ahy-ruh-nee, ahy-er-]
–noun, plural -nies.
1. the use of words to convey a meaning that is the opposite of its literal meaning: We are certainly fortunate to have a President concerned about education. "Rarely is the question asked: Is our children learning?" Well, is they?

2. Literature.
a. a technique of indicating, as through character or plot development, an intention or attitude opposite to that which is actually or ostensibly stated. No way can I improve on the Bard: "I come not to praise Caesar, but to bury him." It just doesn't get any better.

3. an outcome of events contrary to what was, or might have been, expected. "I am announcing a $5 million dollar grant for small businesses" and then getting outed for spending only $4300.00 on a prostitute.
or perhaps "“Well, we've got good relations with a lot of members of OPEC. If the president does his job, the president will earn capital in the Middle East, and get OPEC to open their spigots, and the president should have good standing with those nations. It's important for the president to explain, in clear terms, what high energy prices will not only do to our economy, but what high energy prices will do to the world economy.” Thankfully, our President is just as skilled at foreign relations as he is public speaking.

4. an objectively sardonic style of speech or writing. (see Scott.... and Jessica....) "Iraqi terrorist Khay Rahnajet didn't pay enough postage on a letter bomb. It came back with "return to sender" stamped on it. Forgetting it was the bomb, he opened it and was blown to bits." It's good to know the new improved security measures of the US Postal service caught this. Though it does seem a bit harsh to blow people up for insufficient postage.

At Dick Cheney's recent birthday party, the cake was Chocolate with Lipitor frosting.