Thursday, January 17, 2008

Dead Motorcyclists causing accidents

Of course its a possibility:

"In a world where carpenters become kings, anything is possible".

Scenario A) A motorcyclist is riding through the night, intent on reaching home, his thoughts occupied with the impending birth of his child. Unexpectedly the defect in a minor capillary in his brain ruptures, killing him instantly. His hand spasms around the throttle and the motorcycle accelerates continuously until the inevitable crash. His wife discovers that his insurance company will not pay, citing an obscure clause in the policy. Afraid she will be unable to afford to raise a child on her sole income, she gives the child ( a girl )up for adoption. Years pass, and in a strange twist of fate her adopted daughter begins working for her now-successful as a clothing designer birth mother. They form a bond that neither fully understands, until a series of conversations and events leads them to uncover the true nature of their relation. A tearful and happy reunion ensues. (Lifetime channel version)

Scenario B)) A motorcyclist is riding through the night, intent on reaching home, his thoughts occupied with the impending birth of his child. Unexpectedly the defect in a minor capillary in his brain ruptures, killing him instantly. His hand spasms around the throttle and the motorcycle accelerates continuously until the inevitable crash. His wife discovers that his insurance company will not pay, citing an obscure clause in the policy. In despair and frustration, the mother descends into a world of drugs, alcohol and prostitution. Her daughter is nearly dragged down with her, but escapes by running away. She becomes a top-notch attorney, using an assumed identity. After a successful and very public case, her mother recognizes her and shows up, threatening to expose her if she does not pay her several hundred thousand dollars. The daughter strikes her across the face, and the mother falls and hits her head on a table, receiving a fatal injury. The daughter in desperation hides the body, hoping that her mother will never be missed. Sadly, the mother has actually been trying to turn her life around by working at a homeless shelter, and her absence is reported to the police. A days long investigation unravels the entire story (Without a Trace version, or the WE version if the daughter gets abused at any point)

Scenario C) A motorcyclist is riding through the night, intent on reaching home, his thoughts occupied with the impending birth of his child. Unexpectedly the defect in a minor capillary in his brain ruptures, killing him instantly. His hand spasms around the throttle and the motorcycle accelerates continuously until the inevitable crash. His wife discovers that his insurance company will not pay, citing an obscure clause in the policy. In the hospital days later, screams of panic and the sound of people frantically running can be heard in the delivery room, just as her child is being born. The doctors have just severed the umbilical cord and turned to see the cause of the commotion when the doors to the operating room burst open. Framed in the doorway is her dead husband, there to witness the birth. (Stephen King version)

Scenario D) ) A motorcyclist is riding through the night, intent on reaching home, his thoughts occupied with the impending birth of his child. Unexpectedly the defect in a minor capillary in his brain ruptures, killing him instantly. His hand spasms around the throttle and the motorcycle accelerates continuously until the inevitable crash. His wife discovers that his insurance company will not pay, citing an obscure clause in the policy. In a fury the pregnant mother goes on a killing spree, gunning down and eliminating in various unsavory manners the trail of underhanded, corrupt and greedy insurance people, culminating in a wild gun battle on the top floor of the corporate headquarters where she must fight her way through a maze of cubicles and offices, battling hordes of armed security guards to reach the company president. He also has a gun and badly wounds her but runs out of ammunition. Grabbing a katana off the wall, they continue to fight as she demonstrates her stunning martial arts skills. He finally gains the upper hand, but while monologuing he fails to notice she has found a letter opener on the floor. She stabs him in the groin as he raises the sword, and then kicks him hard enough to send him through the plate glass window, falling 10 stories and impaling himself on a streetlight below. (Quentin Tarantino version)

Scenario E) ) A motorcyclist is riding through the night, intent on reaching Nirvana, his thoughts occupied with the color scheme for penguins. Unexpectedly the defect in a minor capillary in his brain becomes a breadfruit, killing him instantly. His hand spasms around the throttle and the motorcycle accelerates continuously until it hits a giant cream pie. His wife discovers that his insurance company will not pay, citing existentialism and large fries. She gives birth to a wombat, who learns to tap dance and sing, causing the people of Earth to all convert to Buddhism and wear flowers and shredded newspapers as clothing (Eugene Ionesco version)

Scenario F) ) A motorcyclist is riding through the night, intent on reaching home, his thoughts occupied with the impending birth of his child. Sadly, Dick Cheney is out hunting and shoots him by mistake, as the black leather and helmet cause him to think the rider is a deer. Cheney is fined for not having a motorcycle permit, and goes on to become the next president, having secured the vote of the right wing entirely for eliminating an obviously liberal/radical/hippie-scum/biker, who was probably gay anyway. (Reality version)

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